the “right” to be angry.

What give someone the right to be angry?

Is it when they are the legit victim of something? Likely…

Is it simply when someone evokes angry emotions out of another? Iffy… 

Do you have the right to be angry if someone hurts you? If someone on your job does you dirty, if a loved one does something stupid that screws up something in your life?

Do you have the right to be angry when you get confronted about something? When someone questions you about something you’re doing wrong and you just don’t want to be questioned about it?

What gives you the right to be angry?


 

If you are called out or confronted about when you did someone dirty, or because you did something wrong, what gives you the right to be angry about the repercussions of your actions?

Does a person truly have the right to be angry at a chain of events set off by them, by their own actions?

Do you have the right to get angry at someone for being angry at you?

I don’t agree with the idea that you get to be angry at someone for being angry at you (particularly when you have NOT tried talking to the party upset with you).

I don’t agree that you get to be angry at someone for asking questions or calling you out for doing something wrong either…

If I see at work that you doing something that might be considered, IDK – foul…. and I call you out, are you going to get mad at me? Maybe you shouldn’t be doing it or maybe you should learn to be a bit more discreet – of course, in my book, the answer is: don’t do it.

I saw a guy out in public and he was with someone that was not his wife. Now, in the setting we were in, it could have easily been a friendship you know, but… this woman was all over him. I don’t care how close of friends they are, he is married and in no way, shape, or form, should another woman be all over a married man like that. I lost respect for that man.

Now… I didn’t call him out. The relationship that I have with him was not gained through my own means, but through someone else, so it wasn’t my place… but he lost ALL the respect from me that day. What he was doing was wrong – which seems to be the case with a lot of the people who run in his circle… but that’s a whole different time and place.

My point: had I called him out, he probably would have been angry, but what right would he have had to be angry at me for asking him how his wife was doing or if his wife knew the woman who had been laid all over him – he would be mad at someone for being “in his business” or maybe just over the fact that somebody was calling him out

I think that’s part of society’s problem… people are no longer held accountable for their actions and when they are, they get mad. People cannot handle being put in a position where its, you know, either come clean or continue to bullshit and lie even though we know you lying. People get upset because they don’t know how to handle being confronted with some real shit.

It feels like now-a-days we are coddling people in a society where cheating is acceptable, lying and cheating to get ahead in life is acceptable, stepping over others and doing other people dirty to get ahead is acceptable.

We’re coddling people by not confronting them or not calling them out on shit. We think that we don’t have the right to do something because the other person might get angry……. SO WHAT? They don’t have the right to get angry!

People need to be called out and the problem in this society is that no one is willing to stand up and challenge the status quo. No one is willing to stand up and say “hey, that ain’t kosher, let me ask you a question”.

No one wants to ask the hard questions because they don’t want others to get upset about having to provide hard answers.

Example! Do you have a right to get mad when you get questioned about things you say or what you’re doing when the things you say or what you’re doing don’t add up? Do you have the right to get upset with a spouse or your child when they questioning you about something because what you are saying don’t make sense – and don’t have a history of saying shit that ain’t the truth, because, come on… really?

Example! Do you have a right to get angry when you are in a position of power, where you have opened yourself up to be questioned about everything you do, and somebody questions you about something your doing?

Example! If someone gets a promotion or gets accolades, do others have the right to get upset because they got passed over. Do others have the right to say “oh, this is happening because I am Black and he is white”, or “this is happening because she is Black and is getting special treatment as a minority”?  Now here is the kicker… say someone calls out the passed over person who is complaining and tells them it happened because they don’t do shit and didn’t deserve it… do they have a right to get mad?

I mean, damn! What if… IDK, it is because of the hard work they are putting in? What if it just so happens that they don’t take shortcuts. They’re doing shit by the book… they’re doing their job correctly and it’s all working for their good??? You have no right to get angry because you got that ass read!

What right is there to be angry in any of these scenarios?

I get it… sometimes we are provoked into anger. Like I said in the beginning, if somebody is overstepping boundaries and asks me questions about my personal life when they’re not involved in my life personally… that that is provoking to anger. That I can understand. (I’m not saying a friend who sees something is wrong, I’m saying a random ass person who works in the next department stopped and said – hey I heard this)

But asking your spouse what is going on in their life and they get mad about it??? That does nothing but seem like there is something to hid. My previous example about the questions – take the spouses. What right do you have to be upset at your spouse for asking you a private question? Ain’t no privacy biiihhh! AIN’T NONE! A question period! How can you be mad that they are asking questions? And sticking with our spouses, say she has a history of not being truthful… what right does she have to get upset when he is asking a question to clarify that he understands what she is saying or doing, especially when she not giving the full picture. It may not even have been about her history of being untruthful – what person is not going to ask further questions after you give them pieces of information?

If you are creating a full puzzle for me, so that I can see the full picture on it, but only gave me a few pieces to it… either I’m going to keep trying to get more pieces to the puzzle, or I am going to say fuck your picture.

Same example – typically parents don’t appreciate their kids calling them out or questioning them, but let’s be real here: parents seem to forget that their children are not stupid and can see what the hell they are doing. Not only that, but get this shit: eventually children realize that their parents are regular people. One day we come to the realization that our parents are women and men. There are levels to people and parents don’t seem to realize that eventually their children see that this is more than dad, but he is a man and this is more than mom, she is a wife. So when that child is old enough to see certain things and realize some stuff – they are old enough to realize that they want an answer from those people. Parents do not have the right to get mad at their children for calling them out on BULLSHIT.

LAST Example! (oohh shit, here comes the flip side!) At what point in life is it ever ok for a child to be angry at a parent for parenting. It is a parents job to question their children, so how can we justify a child getting mad at their mama, when mama is asking her questions because shit ain’t adding up??????

Stop coddling these kids. They are next generation of people to run this country (this world). Coddled children turn into adults with very few life skills… Coddled children are not coddled by the correctional officers.

Stop coddling spouses. I read a meme once: post – “lets applaud and give a shout out to the people out here not cheating and being faithful to their spouses.” response – “you don’t fucking applaud a fish for swimming.”  

Stop coddling co-workers. “Because I had a team of parasites using my work ethic, my accomplishments, and my compassion and kindness, to get-by, avoid punishments, avoid challenging situations, and move up the career ladder… I, myself, was able to flourish and shine“.  -said NO ONE EVER!!!

Your personal business spread all over the unit by your superiors? You have the right to be mad.

Your college student aged kid confronts you about something you lied about? You need to grow the fuck up and take responsibility for your actions. 

 

 

 

 

caveat:

As a whole, not only do we need to grow up, but we have to stop being afraid of making others angry over things they have no right to be angry over.

Sometimes people need to be called out.

Your courage and sincerity, or you being real with someone, should not be the cause of their UNDESERVED and misplaced anger. That is not your fault.  

 

 

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